MMM: Desire & the Hidden Contract of Unhappiness

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Welcome to Monk Mode Monday, a simple practice every week to play and win the inside-out game of entrepreneurship!

Desire & the Hidden Contract of Unhappiness

“Desire is a contract you make with yourself to be unhappy until you get what you want.”

I was rereading the Almanac of Naval Ravikant this past week and that quote hit home.

Btw, I highly recommend this book if you’re an entrepreneur looking to build wealth and freedom without sacrificing your inner peace.

Let’s talk about desire.

Have you ever had that burning desire to hit your sales targets, design the perfect marketing campaign, or nail that perfect product?

And in that desire, felt the pinch of discontent, the subtle wave of frustration?

If it rings a bell, you're not alone.

What you might find is that underneath this desire lies an unsigned contract stating “I will not be happy until I achieve this.”

Desire is like fire.

It can cook your food, warm your house, or it can cause devastation.

It's not the fire, but how we manage it, that ends up defining our happiness and peace or lack of.

Now there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having desires. In the realm of entrepreneurship, where dreams meet the work, it's essential to have clear desired outcomes and to work towards them.

The key is to choose your desires mindfully, rather than being lost in your desires.

Most of us go around desiring things unconsciously and then wondering why we’re unhappy.

The Monkey King (the mind) within all of us sometimes gets the better of us—aspiring to conquer the whole jungle in one breath.

Keep it simple. One core desire, one mission at a time.

And remember that you are choosing to sign this contract with yourself.

The belief that a change in your outside world will present you with the holy grail of joy and peace is delusional.

It doesn’t mean you should do things on the outside. You totally should. We’re living creatures, evolutionary hunters biologically wired to seek growth, transformation, and forward action.

You’re meant to do something. Called by the universe to do something great. You should go and do what you’re meant to do.

The key is in being aware that in the doing, it’s your desire that is also the source of your suffering.

Being aware of this reminds you that happiness and peace are your default state. It’s always there when you remove the sense of something missing in your life.

“The three big ones in life are wealth, health, and happiness. We pursue them in that order, but their importance is reverse.” - Naval

Happiness, peace of mind, love, and joy aren’t things you find. They’re choices you make.

Choose your desires wisely and prioritize your inner peace.

Now that you're armed with this insight, it's time to put it into action. This week's challenge is designed to refine your understanding and help you navigate the maze of desire.

Challenge: Unmasking Desire

1. Think: Spend 5 minutes contemplating one of your biggest desires. How does it make you feel? Unsettled or excited?

2. Write: In your journal, write down the emotions and sensations that arose when you focused on this desire. Be honest with yourself.

3. Reflect: Journal about how this desire might be contributing to your unhappiness. Jot down if you’re allowing this desire to veil your present joy and peace.

4. Re-align: Based on your reflections, realign your relationship with this desire? Can you pursue it without compromising peace and contentment?

The challenge aims to help you befriend your desires rather than dread them.

Remember, in the dance of entrepreneurship, let desire lead the rhythm, but never allow it to determine the music.

On this note, may you embark on your week—conscious, aware, and rooted in your inner truth. Less of discontent, more of aligned doing. Less of craving, more of aligned creating.

Catch you in next week's letter.

Happy Monk Mode Monday,

Your Pal Colin.